I Had Breast Cancer On My Wedding Day

Have you ever thought you were "all that?" Untouchable? Invincible? On top of the world? That's how I felt on my wedding day. I was a successful single mother and Houston entrepreneur with several major awards under my belt, an Ebony magazine top bachelorette and had reconnected with my college sweetheart after a sixteen year hiatus. Yes, I was finally getting married after a string of painful relationships at the age of 35 and ready to live happily ever after.

As I flip through my wedding album, all of the details are a blur. I don't notice the flowers or the detailed cake. What I cherish is the genuine smile on my face which reflects the love in my heart for so many things- life, my husband, my daughter, my family and friends. Dazzling in my strapless wedding gown, little did I know I had breast cancer. Ironic isn't it? I look so happy while cancer was dwelling inside me.

I never would have imagined that I would grow up to have breast cancer. When I first noticed the marble sized lump under my armpit eight months prior to my wedding day, I dismissed it as a swollen lymph gland as a result of a sinus infection. Life went on while the tumor grew. I found every excuse not to go to the doctor. My grandmother had breast cancer so I knew that there may be a slight likelihood that I would have it but I convinced myself that Superwoman doesn't get cancer.

Shortly after my honeymoon, my husband urged me to go to the doctor to determine the cause of the lump which was beginning to get bigger. Within four days of seeing the doctor, I was diagnosed with Stage III A breast cancer. I had a lumpectomy and axillary lymph node dissection with 16 positive lymph nodes. Due to the positive nodes, chemotherapy would be a treatment option. The thought of chemotherapy was terrifying to me. I had always had a headful of beautiful long hair which was highly prized in the Black community. I couldn't imagine being bald and taking my new husband through the negative cosmetic changes.

After much research and consideration, I opted for 4 cycles of chemotherapy. My hair began to fall out about twenty days after my first treatment. One day while driving, I got a wave of courage and drove to the nearest salon. I decided it was time to empower myself and just shave my head. It was falling out daily and was matted and dry. To my surprise, I didn't shed one tear in the chair. The big picture was extending my life; hair couldn't rob me of that.

Since the thought of losing my hair was so frightening to me, I went on a Houston, Texas community affairs program bald to show viewers that being bald wasn't so bad and what the result of chemotherapy looked like. I even shared home video of my hair falling out to help other women facing this medical challenge. For a former Texas beauty queen, this took a lot of courage.

As my one year "cancerversary" approaches, I realize that God was holding my hand the entire journey. He gave me strength and courage when I needed it and he broke me down so I could grow strong with Him again. I also realize the meaning of true beauty and it isn't based on external features.

I never heard my 13 year old daughter say to me that she was proud of me, despite my numerous accomplishments, until I showed her my bald head. She gave me the biggest hug and I knew that it would be ok. I am forever humbled by this experience and hope to share my testimony with other young patients someday. Cancer doesn't care if you are all that and a bag of chips. Cancer doesn't care at all.